Thursday, January 27, 2011

Crabs of the World - #4 Kansas

A Kansas Pom-Pom Crab (Lybia tesselata kansasensis)
pictured here with head cheerleader Ginger Muffington.

Bio-Theologians from Kansas University today shocked the scientific world with the publication of the first definitive proof of the theory of Intelligent Design. Their findings show that KU cheerleaders are infested with a unique sub-species of pom-pom crab with coloration exactly matching that of the KU Jayhawks.

Team-leader, Professor Chip Quackenbush told a packed press conference: "of course all cheerleaders harbor a rich and varied assortment of crustaceans, but the odds against this color combination occurring randomly are literally astronomical."

At an emergency meeting, the Texas Board of Education ordered the recall of all Biology textbooks from the Texas school system. Teams of fundamentalist Bio-theologians are working round the clock to rush out new texts with all reference to Darwinian selection removed.

Famed Rationalist Professor Richard Dawkins declined to be interviewed before his retirement to a Trappist monastery on the Franco-Swiss border.

26 comments:

  1. The prof's name is a nice touch.

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  2. I knew that if we perservered, we'd disprove evolution! Viva god!

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  3. That cheerleader has the most epic name! Ginger Muffinton classic :D

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  4. i think some investigative reporting is required. to get down and see for ourselves. i recommend sanchez to get down and dirty in some muffs...

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  5. Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true.

    -Homer Simpson, back when he was actually worth half a chuckle

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  6. There REALLY is such a thing as a pom pom crab!

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  7. I don't know what to say, this is beyond godlike! Scary at the same time.

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  8. That's just messed up. Is this real?

    tehhappyplace.blogspot.com

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  9. Wow! nice post! keep it coming! :)

    Supporting!

    http://blazaimagenes.blogspot.com/

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  10. Crab Cheerleader! I want to see him at a sports game.

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  11. Crab cheerleader? 100% less likely to hit on the quarterback!

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  12. As I have always guessed....
    college students have a variety of crabs.

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